Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The doctor dude will see you now

It seems to be my moment for these things, but I have been having some computer trouble. Why mince words? Right now I'm computerless. I do love my MacBookPro. It weighs a ton, but we know better than to judge someone by his or her weight, especially when he or she has style, lots of style.

But in any case, as I was waiting at the Apple Genius Bar, as I was overhearing other people describe their computer problems, I realized (the obvious) : it is identical to describing your symptoms to a doctor. You try (or at least you should) to be concise in describing the problem, but provide enough on the key moments when you think the problem developed and when the problem is experienced or not. And of course you edit out the embarrassing details. Exactly like being at the doctor:

Doc, I hear noises in my head. It started six months ago, maybe a year, but I've been ignoring it. I think it may be because I took too many flights in economy class . You should also know that I was smashed last night I don't drink enough water. I'm like a camel really. I wonder if that could be the cause instead?

Dude, my computer is acting up -- keeps on rebooting. It started two months ago, but I've been ignoring it. I think it may be because I took my computer on too many flights in economy, where there aren't any plugs. You should also know that I use my computer while in the bath except on planes, I always keep it plugged in. I'm like a leech really. I wonder if over-charging caused the problem instead?

Well, the dude in question was a very knowledge young man with interesting tattoos on his arms, and disgusting facial hair (disgusting because it was clearly deliberate, not just sloppy; let's leave it at that). He tested it for a few hours last night, while I was waiting. Let me tell you, malls are no better places to wait than hospitals, especially when your poor little computer has all kinds of pins and needles sticking into it. In any case, after the diagnostics, he said that my computer needs a new prefontal cortex hard drive.

The reason I am not (yet... fingers crossed) pulling my hair out, other than the fact that thin hair runs in the family and I really shouldn't encourage this situation, is that I have backed up my data by my count 6 times in different places. But what I also did before letting them operate was to mirror the computer. Now I don't want this to get too technical (since I don't understand the technicalities), but it copies everything from your computer onto an external hard drive and you can run your computer from there with everything on it (including software) and eventually copy it back on to the computer when the new hard drive is installed. In other words, in the best of all possible worlds, it will be like transplanting my computer's brain and then copying everything back as it was. That's the best case of course. The worst case is this...

(I was looking here for a link to the story about the man in Texas who had his pet bull cloned. The original bull was huge, but sweet as a puppy. The cloned bull looked identical but had the nasty habit of impaling his doting owner on his horns.)

In any case, I would like to conclude this rambling post with a word of advice to all you Mac users out there. You must not only back up your computer but mirror its contents to a firewire hard drive (note this is crucial -- must be firewire, cannot be usb). In principle time capsule can do this for you, but you need to set it up right...

Now I must get back to sleep work.



Anonymous said...

hilarious! :D

Anonymous said...

well...on this auspicious day....(seriously who really considers this a bad luck day anymore??...all the Friday the 13th movies have ruined that!;)...
i am wishing that you and your computer will soon be together so "less" is replaced by "more" in your life...;)

Bombay Beauty said...

Thank you both! You're right about the 13th. A friend of mine is getting married today at City Hall! I'm not at the wedding, but will be at the dinner tonight! BB

Lola Is Beauty said...

Backed up in six places - and mirrored? I can see why you're not so worried. But Macs aren't supposed to do that are they? Oh no - I have been warned! Must get one of those mirror thingies - I haven't backed up since I got the Mac last Aug. Oops. After I've sorted out the moths, and the mould and the damp - hey that's three things if we're being superstitious - not fair if I get another one - though the damp/mould is possibly counted as one thing.

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